(Every Friday I interview a different person and share that interview with you. Perhaps they will be a fellow-author. Perhaps one of my neighbors. Maybe the bagger at the grocery store. A member of my family. A follower of this blog. Maybe it will be you! Hey, it could happen.)
Today's guest is the fantastic Jewel Busch, who wrote her very own introduction. (Don't you just love cooperative guests? I sure do!) In Jewel's own words, "I'm a mom who likes to read...and therefore, I like Sarah M. Eden." And I like you, Jewel!
SME: Welcome to INFF!If you'd like to be interviewed for "I Need Friends" Friday, shoot me off an email: friends at sarahmeden dot com!
Jewel: Thank you! I'm glad to be here!
SME: Your husband was my Halloween Friday friend which makes this interview kind of historic. I believe it is the first time I have interviewed both halves of a married couple (other than myself and my husband)!
Jewel: I feel historic right now!
SME: As you should!
Jewel: Yeah. So does that mean I should congratulate myself on being interesting enough to interview, having the good sense to marry someone interesting enough to interview, or both?
SME: Definitely both. As revealed in his INFF interview, Steve's favorite holiday is Halloween. What's your favorite?
Jewel: Christmas, hands down.
SME: Does your house get as thoroughly decorated for Christmas as it does for Halloween?
Jewel: Not yet. I was living in Taiwan as a missionary while Steve was collecting all of his Halloween decorations, so he's had a bit longer to build up his Halloween supply than I have had to work on my Christmas decorations, but that is in the process of being remedied, never you fear.
SME: And does Steve realize that he is obligated to contribute to your Christmas decoration gathering efforts? I think any loving husband would willingly do so. hint, hint
Jewel: Oh, he's actually pretty good about it. In fact, he put up all of our outside decorations this year without even complaining!! Taking them down was a different story, however...
SME: Can't really blame him there. Somehow it seems cruelly unfair that Christmas lights, etc. take so long to put up and then have to come back down so soon after Christmas. Kind of depressing, actually.
Jewel: I agree. In Taiwan, they leave them up until Chinese New Year, which can be as late as March. I think we should pick up that tradition here. It would also make it a lot less chilly when taking down the outside decorations.
SME: Chinese New Year was on Sunday, and, according to my sources, this is the year of the Tiger. Did you ever learn what the different "year ofs" are supposed to mean? I always wondered.
Jewel: They're kind of similar to our horoscope--if you're born in a certain year, you have certain tendencies. I was born in the year of the Ox. Talk about something every woman wants to be compared to...
SME: "Hello, my name is Jewel. I'm an Ox." Yeah, I can see how that would be less than flattering.
Jewel: Right? And even the tendencies I'm supposed to have are boring. Steady, reliable...slow...
SME: I'm pretty sure the place mat at the Chinese restaurant we went to for years said I was year of the Ram. Not much better than Ox. I wonder what my "tendencies" are supposed to be?... Senility, poorly timed bouts of laughter and an obsessive affinity for Cheetos
Jewel: Actually, you're surprisingly accurate!! Although the obsessive affinity for Cheetos was actually translated as "an obsessive affinity for cheese-flavored crunchy snacks" in my Chinese dictionary.
This may be an obvious question, but tradition demands I ask: What's your favorite continent?
Jewel: Well, can I have a tie?
Jewel: Then my tie is between North America and Asia. I absolutely love the Asian culture, and I enjoyed living there for a year and a half, but it also really helped me appreciate the freedoms and the luxuries we are able to enjoy here in the good ol' US of A. So it's rather impossible for me to pick a favorite, actually.
SME: Hooray for Asia! Every vote counts in the "Favorite Continent" race. Now... how about a game?
Jewel: I'd love one.
SME: Just for you, I am resurrecting the game "Putting the Guess in Guest," in which I ask you a series of completely unrelated questions, the answers to which are pretty much inconsequential. Get them right and you will be crowned champion of INFF!
Jewel: I am SO EXCITED for this---it's been the dream of my life to be the champion of INFF!!
SME: It is an honor, for sure. Question 1--A man in Sanford, Florida learned the true meaning of "adding insult to injury" recently when...
a.) He was attacked by a bear and then ticketed for "unintentionally feeding wildlife"
b.) He was rear-ended by a driver who was texting while driving, and the investigating officer had the man's car impounded after running his plates and realizing the car's registration was expired
c.) He was slugged at church by his irate girlfriend, who then went on a verbal rampage and thoroughly insulted him in front of the entire congregation
Jewel: Oooh...so many possibilities...I'm going to pick b. It seems the most likely.
SME: This will clearly display what a warped sense of humor I really have, but I LAUGHED OUT LOUD when I read this news item. The answer is... wait for it, wait for it... A!!!!!!!!
Jewel: Holy cow!! I honestly wanted to guess that one, because it was so ridiculous, but...wow. Really? Talk about ironic.
SME: "Unintentionally Feeding Wildlife" hahahahahaha! The dude got mauled by a bear, how can you then ticket him for accidentally providing the thing with a meal?
Jewel: He kind of has the worst life ever.
SME: Still I laughed. I am a sick and twisted person.
Question 2--A man accused of "brandishing a box-cutter" in an attempted hold up was later found where by authorities and subsequently arrested?
a.) at a hardware store trying to return the box cutter, claiming it was defective
b.) in a box
c.) at home watching a "cutting implements" marathon on QVC
Jewel: a. At a hardware store. Some people are not very smart.
SME: Are you sure you want to give that answer? *shakes head NO* (Think, what is the most ridiculous answer, 'cause that's probably correct)
Jewel: Oh, I mean, no...um...b? In a box?
SME: It's B!!! Good job!! He was In. A. Box. hahahahahahahaha!
Jewel: Oh. Wow. Maybe he should have returned the box cutter. Because it obviously didn't get him out of the box...
SME: Amen, sister!
Alright. Last question. A man in Colorado got a double-take from the Denver Police Department after being arrested for identity theft because...
a.) he was the previously-unknown identical twin brother of a vetran police officer
b.) he speaks only in questions
c.) his actual name is "Robin Hood"
Jewel: This is hard. Can I phone a friend?
SME: Sure. As long as the friend's name isn't "Google"
Jewel: Darn it.
SME: (And I'll give you a hint. The first answer was A. The second answer was B. And I believe in patterns. And alphabetical order. Hint. Hint)
Jewel: C. Robin Hood.
SME: How do you do it? C is correct. "Robin Hood" got busted!!!
Jewel: Wow. What were his parents thinking?
SME: That makes you the INFF champion! *streamers, and blaring victory horns!*
Jewel: Whoo hoo!! Can I make a victory speech?
SME: Please do.
Jewel: I'd like to thank all of the little people who helped make this happen...mainly, these criminals for having ridiculous enough situations to be noted by an author across the country and used for this INFF game. I couldn't have done it without you.
Oh, yeah, and thanks to Sarah too, I guess...
SME: Good idea thanking me. Otherwise I might not have shown you your portrait. That, trust me, would have been tragic!
Jewel: Oh, yes, it would have. I've been dying to see it!! I can hardly wait...
SME: Then, let's take a little trip to the Portrait Gallery.
Jewel: *Giggles in anticipation*
*felt pens put to good use*
Jewel: I'm...I'm...I'm beautiful!! I love that you drew me with red hair.
SME: Your hair is technically brown, but there's a hint of red in it so I thought... what the heck, I'm gonna make it red!
Jewel: I've been trying to convince mine to go that direction for years.
SME: So, see, you should show this portrait to your hair so it will agree to take the plunge and go full-on red!
Jewel: I'm talking to my hair right now. ("See? That's what you should look like!")
SME: This brings us to the final question of the interview: Top 5 reasons this is the best blog interview you've ever done. Ready. Go.
Jewel: 1. I had a redhead draw me with red hair--a dream come true!
2. I got to feel historic
3. I got to feel honored.
4. I got some brand-new high heels with red bows on them
5. I got to talk to my very favoritest author in the whole entire world!!
SME: Aaah. I'm so glad I helped you cheat on the game... er... um...
Jewel: And I'm glad you helped me cheat on the game. I couldn't have won without you.
SME: We'll just keep the whole cheating thing between us. I don't think anyone will notice, anyway.
Jewel: Gee, thanks!! I'd be great with that.
SME: Thanks so much for stopping by and being my newest Friday Friend!
Jewel: Thanks for letting me!! Not even lying, it's been a highlight of my week!!
SME: *cue exit music* Well, this has been "I Need Friends" Friday. Come back next week when I will make another friend!!
I am looking for anyone and everyone, whether or not you think you are interesting. You'll get a fantastic stick figure portrait of yourself, a little promotion (if you're looking for that sort of thing) and the opportunity to tell your friends and family that you've been interviewed by SME, er... by ME!
(Remember--If Jewel gets 5 or more comments, she receives 2 additional entries into February's giveaway!!)