Friday, September 4, 2009

I Need Friends Friday: Aubrey Mace

It's that time of the week:

(Every Friday I interview a different person and share that interview with you. Perhaps they will be a fellow-author. Perhaps one of my neighbors. Maybe the bagger at the grocery store. A member of my family. A follower of this blog. Maybe it will be you! Hey, it could happen.)

Today's friend is the talented Aubrey Mace. She is the author of two novels, My Fairy Grandmother released earlier this year and Spare Change, the 2008 Whitney Award winner for "Best Romance." Her third novel, Santa Maybe, will be out this month.


SME: Welcome to I Need Friends Friday.

Aubrey: Thank you. I'm so excited to be your Friday friend.

SME: So, tell us a little about yourself. (Do you like how I optimistically assume there will be other people reading this?)

Aubrey: Umm... that's kind of broad. What would you like to know?

SME: I am SO glad you asked. Essential question #1: What is your favorite cookie?

Aubrey: These lemon drop sugar cookies from this place by me called Smart Cookie. To. Die. For. They also have almond.

SME: And are they truly "smart"? Or is that just a clever marketing ploy?

Aubrey: I don't feel so smart after I've eaten a few. Yet I keep going back...

SME: Sounds smart to me.

Aubrey: I think it's the schload of cream cheese frosting that really gets me.

SME: Cream cheese is one of the necessary food groups.

Aubrey: Absolutely. Anything is better with cream cheese, right? Like cream cheese wontons. Mmmmm.

SME: Essential question #2: What is your favorite continent?

Aubrey: My favorite continent? Probably Europe. They have cream cheese, right?

SME: Cream cheese capital of the world. Have you ever been to Europe?

Aubrey: I have. I went with my sister for a graduation present from my parents.

SME: *dealing with sudden burst of blinding jealousy* Where in Europe did you go?

Aubrey: One of those whirlwind tours where you see eight countries in thirteen days. It was awesome. We went to Germany, Switzerland, Belgium, Italy, France, England, etc.

SME: So sort of the travel version of an All-You-Can-Eat buffet.

Aubrey: Exactly. And this was before the Euro, so every time we turned around, the currency changed.

SME: Which country was your favorite?

Aubrey: Probably Italy, if I had to choose. But London was great.

SME: *Sudden increase in jealousy. Dealing with it. Dealing with it.* I've always wanted to go to London.

Aubrey: Hey-- maybe we could go together!

SME: What did you do there?

Aubrey: We went with a tour group with an average age of 65. So mainly we just tried not to irritate the rest of the group with our "youthful exuberance". Plus, London was at the beginning of the trip and I was still so jet lagged that it's kind of foggy. I want to go back one day and just chill.

SME: I'm a very experienced chiller.

Aubrey: We could have our mutual book signing in London!

SME: I'm in! Then I could use that British accent I've been working on. 'Cause that wouldn't irritate people.
So, Speaking of plans and book signings and accents... I've been pondering our little plot to sneak doctored bookstore catalogs (altered to contain my books because Aubrey's is in there already and I felt left out) into various stores while dressed as authors who are far more famous than we are.

For the sake of those reading this fabulous interview, I should explain, our thought - and it is frightening to think we have actually put a great deal of thought into this scheme - was that people in the bookstores will be so much in awe of the authors they think they are seeing, that they will fail to notice the contraband catalogs we are surreptitiously slipping onto counter tops.

Aubrey: I am so ready to see these disguises!

SME: I have for you pictures that show with alarming accuracy how we will look on the store surveillance cameras when we pull off this little scheme of ours.

Aubrey: Oh dear. I didn't think about the surveillance cameras.

SME: Trust me. I think we're good. I don't think we would even be recognized. Alright. Here's what you'll look like.

Aubrey: You're a GENIUS! No one would ever suspect us in a million years!

SME: I thought the name tag was a nice touch.

Aubrey: Yes. Do you think Janette will be taking out a restraining order?

SME: What Janette doesn't know can't hurt us.

SME: Now a photo of me in disguise, because this isn't going to work if we can't both slip by security.

Aubrey: Yours is great too! I'm still jealous that you get to do the accent.

SME: Except, all I can say is "'ello Guvnuh" and "Cheerio!"

Aubrey: You're JK Rowling! No one cares what you're saying!

SME: I probably should work on saying "Harry Potter." That might be a give away.

Aubrey: Yes. Practice your "Harry Potter" and the world is ours!

SME: Alright. You're totally styling in your RayBan Wayfarers. Thought I'd give you a bit of flair.

Aubrey: They look like the ones Edward wore in Twilight.

SME: Um. Yeah. Edward wore Wayfarers.

Aubrey: Last week you were Edward. Now it's my turn.

SME: I am noticing a trend in these interviews - at least one Twilight reference every Friday.
*quickly veers back into an "actual" interview* So your most recently released book is My Fairy Grandmother. Give us a quick blurb!

Aubrey: It's about Kaitlin, a girl who goes to visit her grandmother, Viola, who she's never met. Viola wants to tell Kaitlin her life story, but when she starts talking about how all the women in their family tree were fairies, Kaitlin knows this is no ordinary story. I like it because you have to decide for yourself whether you think Viola has had an incredible life or is just incredibly senile.

SME: Good blurb!

Aubrey: Why, thank you! It's hard to condense your book into two sentences.

SME: So in your soon-to-be-released novel, Santa Maybe, does someone discover that all the grandpas in their family tree were Santa Claus?

Aubrey: There are no grandpas in the story.

SME: Just so you know, every time I think of your book I get that song, "Santa Baby," stuck in my head.

Aubrey: And for this, I am sorry. But it is a good title.

SME: You can't tell me that wasn't done intentionally.

Aubrey: I can't take credit for it, though. My critique partner Melanie came up with it.

SME: In honor of the song, I have a little quiz for you.

Aubrey: I knew I should have studied!

SME: We're gonna do this eye-exam style. You know when you go to the eye doctor and they say "Which is clearer? 1 or 2? 2 or 3?" And they all look pretty much the same, so you're just guessing... That's what we're going to do.

Aubrey: That sounds fakeable.

SME: (Everything about this interview is fakeable) Let's begin. If you had to choose a gift to receive from Santa, would you choose a sable or a '54 Convertible, light blue?

Aubrey: Convertible, light blue. Fur should stay on animals where it belongs.

SME: Alright. Would you choose the convertible, or a yacht?

Aubrey: I'm still going to have to go with the convertible. I get seasick on boats. Of course, if it was a really big yacht...

SME: The convertible or the deed to a platinum mine?

Aubrey: Depends on whether the mine comes with... help.

SME: I'm assuming it means you get the profits and someone else does the work.

Aubrey: That sounds perfect. Sign me up.

SME: Okay. Platinum mine or a duplex AND checks (blank, signed by Mr. Claus)

Aubrey: I guess with the platinum mine you could buy said duplex, but I must admit the checks are tempting.

SME: So you're sticking with the mine?

Aubrey: Could I get a look at Santa's finances before I made the decision?

SME: Nope. This is a decision you must make in ignorance.

Aubrey: Sigh. I think I'd take the mine. Santa's VISA bill in January must be crippling.

SME: So very true. So, the mine or a tree trimmed with fab items straight from Tiffany's.

Aubrey: Wow. I am easily distracted by shiny things.

SME: Like diamonds. Which is the last thing on the list. Dare I even ask if it can compete with the mine?

Aubrey: Is this a new mine or a...mined mine?

SME: Again, ignorance.

Aubrey: You're kinda harsh with the info flow.

SME: I ask the hard-hitting questions. This is an interview not a chat over canasta.

Aubrey: Fair enough. I've stuck with the mine this long-- I can't abandon it now. Besides, I can buy diamonds with the proceeds.

SME: Ding. Ding. Ding. We have a winner. "The deed to a platinum mine." Now everyone who has Award-Winning Author Aubrey Mace on their Christmas shopping list knows what to buy.
Thought I'd throw in the "Award-winning" part so it sounds more legitimate. Plus, there's the whole issue of my all-consuming jealousy over the Whitney you won last year.

Aubrey: It'll be your turn next.

SME: If not, I have plans in place to obtain a certain previously-awarded Whitney for Best Romance of 2008. These plans are nefarious and entirely illegal, not to mention highly improbable.

Aubrey: It's been so quiet lately I wondered if you'd given up.

SME: Oh no. I simply mean to catch you unawares. In the meantime, I have devised another plan that will add to the enjoyment and potential success of this destined-to-occur signing of ours.

Aubrey: Tell me.

SME: I figure we should give the public what they want. Everyone is always worried about what shoes to match with an outfit, what purse goes with the shoes. It's all about pairings. I've worked out a list of book pairings to run past you - sort of a "We Go Together" of literature.

Aubrey: That sounds intriguing.

SME: Your book Spare Change paired with My book As You Are
  • Spare Change the female romantic lead needs money for cancer research, a very worthy cause
  • As You Are the female romantic lead needs money so she and her children aren't left destitute: again, a worthy cause.
Aubrey: I'm liking this already.

SME: Pairing # 2: My Fairy Grandmother, by You and The Price Paid, by Me
  • My Fairy Grandmother a young lady finds out her grandmother is a fairy
  • The Price Paid a young gentleman finds out his house is haunted.
    A little supernatural element going on in both.
Aubrey: It's almost uncanny, isn't it? Except I'm going to run out of books LONG before you do.

SME: No worries. I have a feeling we'll be at this when we're old and gray and senile.

Aubrey: Wouldn't that be awesome? And you could steal my Whitney quite easily then and tell me it was yours. I'd never know the difference.

SME: So perhaps biding my time is the best strategy. *does some quick, yet deep, pondering*
Pairing #3, 4 & 5: Santa Maybe paired with Affectations/Drops of Gold/Through All Hopes
  • Santa Maybe is a romance that takes place around Christmastime;
  • Affectations/Drops of Gold/Through All Hopes are romances that take place around Christmastime
Aubrey: I've really got to get my hands on more of your books!

SME: And I, apparently, need to find a new favorite holiday!

Aubrey: Nah. Everyone loves a Christmas romance, right? At least, I'm hoping they do.

SME: So how close to Christmas does Santa Maybe come out?

Aubrey: Amazon has the release date listed as September 8th.

SME: So very soon.

Aubrey: I hope so. Because it's going to be hard to sell in January.

SME: True.

Aubrey: It's a very fun story. Even scrooges will like it. (The cover blurb says so.)

SME: And cover blurbs are like hips - they don't lie.

Now on to the portion of the interview where I draw a portrait of my new friend.

*the sound of an expertly utilized drawing implement can be heard working in the background*

SME: So are you ready to see your portrait? I've taken special care with this one. I think you'll like it.

Aubrey: I thought you'd never ask!

Aubrey: I LOVE it. I'm totally framing that.

SME: I sneaked in a little subliminal advertising there with the shoes.

Aubrey: Any advertising is appreciated, subliminal or otherwise.

SME: So, to wrap up. My final question... Top 5 reasons this is the best blog interview you've ever done. Ready. Go.

Aubrey: 1. I got to talk about sugar cookies. And cream cheese.
2. I got to see our potential famous author costumes.
3. I have a much better chance of getting a platinum mine this year.
4. Shameless plug for all three of my books.
5. Got a chance to chat with one of my favorite partners-in-crime!
6. Oh...and an awesome free portrait/poster!

Aubrey: Yeah, I listed six things. Just because I can.

SME: Well, fellow-criminal, thanks for coming by and plugging shamelessly. Savor a sugar cookie and cream cheese in my honor at some point in the very near future. Enjoy the free portrait - it is a masterpiece.

SME: *cue exit music* Well, this has been "I Need Friends" Friday. Come back next week when I will make another friend!!

If you'd like to be interviewed for "I Need Friends" Friday, shoot me off an email: friends at sarahmeden dot com!
I am looking for anyone and everyone, whether or not you think you are interesting. You'll get a fantastic stick figure portrait of yourself, a little promotion (if you're looking for that sort of thing) and the opportunity to tell your friends and family that you've been interviewed by SME, er... by ME!


Paul D. Eden said...

LOL! I loved the Santa Baby quiz!

Melanie J said...

Uh, you're both crazy.

And yet, I feel sure I'll keep coming back.

What is wrong with me?

Swicks said...

i think a twilight reference SHOULD be a must in all "INFF"...just saying.

Rachel Rossano said...

LOL! Thanks for bring us another INFF interview. I was eagerly waiting for Friday just to read the latest installment. :)

Shantel said...

I LOVE cream cheese!!!! What a lame comment.

Cindy R. Williams said...

Sarah, I am still chuckling as I write this. I have got to meat Aubrey and get her book. The two of you together are incredibly zany writers in crime. Thanks so much for the much needed laughs today! Also huge ANWA cheers for your new Covenant Contract!!!!

Cindy R. Williams said...

Let me PLEASE correct a TYPO of the spelling of meat to meet in my prior message. BIG OOOPS. Guess I was laughing too hard to hit the keys right.

Annette Lyon said...

Mmmmmm . . . cream cheese . . .

M. Gray said...

Your interview was hilarious, ladies! I shall be buying both of your books!

Ashleigh said...

I laughed out loud 7 times while reading this.

Love it.

Aubrey said...

We may be just a TOUCH crazy...but in a good way.

Really wishing that cookie place was open today. Darn Labor Day. :(

Janette Rallison said...

Hey, every time I do a book signing I wish I could pay someone to pretend to be me so I could sit at home in pajamas eating chocolate. Where have you been for the last 13 years?

Great interview!

Karlene said...

Hilarious! I love these interviews.

Krista said...

So great! You two are like Bing Crosby and Fred Astaire (sorry, just watched "Holiday Inn")! It was fun finding your blog. I will be back!


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