Monday, June 16, 2008

Parking Lot Induced Mental Illness

What is it about the vast openness of a parking lot, be it entirely empty or excruciatingly full, that triggers bouts of insanity in the general driving public?
Even the most logical of people seem to view the parallel, orderly lanes as an opportunity to drive diagonally in an attempt to run over as many parking lines as possible. Perhaps we ought to reinstate the "step on a crack, break your momma's back" rule that worked so well on sidewalks when we were children; only apply it to driving over lines.
I'm preparing a petition to have signs posted at all parking lot entrances -

WARNING: The Surgeon General has determined that entering parking lots may lead to elevated blood pressure, permanent tire tread markings on exposed limbs and temporary mental illness.

My plan is to stand outside a Library with a clipboard and pen asking unsuspecting patrons to sign in support of my plan. Of course, I'll probably never make it past the parking lot.

3 comments:

Beam Family said...

Hey Sarah,
I had no idea that you were an author!! How did I miss that? I'll have to get some of your books and read them. Thanks for your comment on our blog. It's nice to hear from you.

russandkatie said...

Ok I just have to laugh at your links on the side of your blog for the meanings of different words because I will admit there were a few times as I was reading your books that I thought to myself how did she learn all of these words and terms for that era... now I know :0) and now I know what they mean too :)

Joe and Ash said...

lf I saw you walking toward the library with a clipboard, I might run you down too...

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